“Reluctant journeys: Do you want to grow a little, push up against your edges, push a little bit beyond your boundaries, your fences? A teacher once told me that it’s when we stretch a bit beyond our edges, push a little bit beyond our comfort zone, we grow a little. Beyond our safety net. The part of us that keeps us protected. Safe. (Uninspired). Bored. Our everyday. If you could push a little bit outside of that, what do you think you’d discover? What would you like to uncover? Set free? A piece of your spirit you’ve held onto tightly out of fear of…what?”
~~(my journal entry from Monday)
Okay, so get to the point (I am my mother’s daughter — there really are no short stories in our lives). About this retreat — I wrote about the place and some ideas I had here and here.
It morphs as I go along, taking its own shape. There’s a quote I love from W.H. Murray that I’ve come across so many times in my reading that I’m finally paying attention to it. My recent reading of it is from a Christmas present (granted it was from me to me), the book, “Creating a Life Worth Living,” and it’s from the beginning of the chapter called “The Dive.”
“Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, that chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness. Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation), there is one elemental truth the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitively commits oneself, then providence moves too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one’s favor all manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings and material assistance, which no person could have dreamed would have come one’s way.”
So, the dive. On to the nuts and bolts of this retreat. What is it about? Where is it, when is it and so on? It’s four days at the end of March 2010, a Thursday afternoon, all day Friday and Saturday, and Sunday morning. Early Spring, moon waxing full. By early spring, I mean “New England style” with ocean effects, meaning bring layers (and maybe an umbrella and wellies). Basically, like New England weather the rest of the year or as Mark Twain said: “give it 5 minutes and it’ll change.” Oh, and bring some pretty adornments and a longish full skirt that you can twirl in.
I’m not sure how many acres we have to roam, all I know is it’s a lot. What with the large organic farm across the street, the state wildlife preserve, and the wooded paths on the property leading over a stream and down to Buttermilk Bay, I’m not letting weather stop me from exploring. Never have. If it’s cold, wet and windy, I’ll imagine I’m the heroine of some long ago novel (bundled up of course) wandering the fields deep in thought. You can gaze across Buttermilk Bay at the old railroad bridge crossing the Cape Cod Canal. If you’re lucky, you might get to see it in action to let a train across. And I’ll look forward to getting back to a rambling Jazz-age farmhouse with its great rooms, roaring fires in the fireplaces (tea, cocoa and ‘smores yeah!), and kindred spirits to gather with.
What it’s about? I imagine it’ll be something different for everyone. From others I’ve read , the retreat experience is different for everyone, which makes it all the more exciting for me. All I can tell you is what it’s been about for me so far — vulnerability, letting go of ego and control, and challenging my fear of commitment. Putting myself out there, wherever there is. But that’s not all it’s about. It’s about growing through an experience that scares me, the process, the connection and the risk. In the end it’s about my life and its meaning for me. Creating a life worth living. Connecting and creating community through deep play — dancing, writing, creating.
My biggest concern has been that many of the beds are shared, but I have learned that most women are pretty comfortable in community — think Girl Scout Camp, Campfire Girls, Nancy, George and Bess; long ago sleepovers with best friends…
The cost is $600. all-inclusive for food, lodging, and your choice of four classes. In tomorrow’s post, beginning with Stephanie, I will start introducing classes and teachers. Registration opens January 1. Please email me at michelleshopped at gmail dot com for the actual registration form or leave me a comment (I am hoping to develop a separate website but for now I’m keeping things simple for myself — part of committing for me is recognizing what to keep and what to let go of in the process). Updated: January 2, 2010 — completed website.
